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Degenerate Menace (-411) - NFL Week 5 Bets

Photo by Dale Zanine, USA Today Sports

by Jeremy Dennis


Well, the ‘Rona has finally hit the NFL. The league lost the Tennessee-Pittsburgh game last week and I lost (presumably) my New England pick because Cam got it and I posted my picks before that information was shared. This week, the announcements keep rolling in. Stephen Gilmore of the Pats now has it. A few more Titans have tested positive. Now, there are reports that the Raiders may have been hit. You know, they should come up with something where all of the players are in the same place and that they can’t leave until they are cleared to. Something like a bubble perhaps? Nah, it will never work…

On to the picks (Note: All COVID related picks are relegated to the Lowest Betting Tier):

Last week: Record 11-4 (73.3%) Top Picks 3-0 (100%) Betting Result: UP 34.1 Units

YTD: Record 34-28-1 (54.8%) Top Picks 9-7 (56.3%) Betting Result: UP 11.7 Units

TOP PICKS (10 Units)

Tampa Bay (-4.5) at Chicago

Ok, the Nick Foles experiment didn’t work so hot against the Colts. This Buc defense isn’t as good but has some playmakers. More importantly, the Tampa offense is MUCH better than Philip Rivers and Co. Barring injury, Tampa outscores them by a wide margin.

L.A. Rams (-7) at Washington

Dwayne Haskins has been benched! YAY! Kyle Allen is your starter! Ohhhhhhhh.

TIER TWO (7 Units)

Carolina (+3) at Atlanta

I don’t know if Atlanta is trying to become “The Most Talented 0-4 Team Ever” but it is not looking good for The A. Carolina has won its last two games outright when being underdogs. There is not much reason why Carolina shouldn’t cover here. Especially, with the Falcon injury situation as it is.

Pittsburgh (-7) vs Philadelphia

The NFC Hot Garbage Division saw a new leader rise from the ashes as the 1-2-1 Philadelphia Eagles defeated the San Francisco 49ers. Did you see what the Washington defensive front did against Philly? You know that Pittsburgh’s front seven is way better right?

Seattle (-7) vs Minnesota

Do we make any hay with Minnesota’s offensive output against the Texans or do we just chalk it up to the Texans sucking? Minnesota can certainly score points but have done a terrible job of stopping anyone this season. Seattle can score with just about anyone at this point and their defense is a little bit better.

Cincinnati (+13.5) at Baltimore

Why is anyone betting against Joe Burrow right now? His teams have covered the last nine numbers. Last time his team didn’t win against the spread? November 16, 2019, against Ole Miss and he missed a -22 by one. Don’t know if maybe Baltimore is starting a little bit between last year’s exit and getting embarrassed by Kansas City a couple of weeks ago.

MEH BETS (4 Units)

N.Y. Giants (+10) at Dallas

San Francisco (-8) vs Miami - would have bet more, but Jimmy G’s status in the air.

Jacksonville (+6) at Houston - I am starting to have bad feelings about the Stache.

Indianapolis (-2) at Cleveland


Arizona (-7) at New York Jets - Flacco stating does not change this one bit.

L.A. Chargers (+7.5) at New Orleans - This game may be moved due to hurricane concerns

Denver (+11) at New England - COVID?

Las Vegas (+14.5) at Kansas City - COVID?

Tennessee (+8.5) vs Buffalo - COVID?

Between storms and pestilence, y’all stay safe out there and have a good weekend!



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